She reminds so much of me

Here is a picture of us at the East Side Gallery, where different artists painted a section of the Berlin Wall.

OK, the real reason that inspired me to write today's blog is that I know another mom whose daughter is a special needs child. She reminds me so much of myself when Jake was younger. She is consumed with getting as many different kinds of help as she can for her child, so was I; she is desperate in seeing some improvement in her child’s development, so was I; she is searching for a miracle that will end this nightmare once for all, so was I; she has so much fear that her child will not talk and walk like every other child on the street, so had I, and she is in so much pain for not being able to change the destiny of her child, so was I; she asks God, why my child, why me, why us? So did I.

It is almost painful to see someone experiencing that kind of pain as I experienced it. But I tried to share with her that, over the years, I have seen friends’ and neighbors’ babies much younger than Jake growing up and far surpass his development; and I’ve came to the realization that it is too painful to torture myself for not being able to change what it is. I remind myself often that it is not enough to want to improve his functional skills, but that I must celebrate Jake for who Jake is, proud of him for who he is, despite his disabilities.

So to my friend, I have no word that can ease your pain or take away your fear, but I hope you can find comfort knowing that you are not alone in feeling the way you feel.